Its been a crazy month to say the least. My life is about to change more than ever, and I am NOT too happy with myself about this.
About two weeks ago I decided I no longer wanted to be in a relationship. I enjoy my freedom and space and I almost got fired from work and I wanted to focus on work and nothing more. So, I became a single woman again. Surprisingly enough, we are just friends. Yes, I have decided to go against my feelings and be friends with him. Its going great! =)
In other news, I mentioned almost getting fired. As you may know, I live far from work. It has been hard trying to get to work on time. I use to struggle with going to work. I got such great anxiety about going to work I would physically make myself sick. So, I would call in sick. After many months of going on and off medical leaves, my doctor finally found a medication that helped me IMMENSELY! I then began to go to work and I didn't call in sick or go home early for a couple months. However, something new began. I was having a lot of trouble falling sleeping but once I was asleep, i was out! This became a very bad thing because I was starting to turn off my alarms (I say it plural because I would set at least 3-5 alarms to wake me up-no joke) unknowingly. With this, I was waking up right before I had to leave or after I should of been at work. Which was resulting in counseling notices and suspensions. After my second suspension, I knew my time at Costco was over. Surprisingly, they ended up giving me one more chance. That very day, I decided my life was going to be devoted to work. My work was so awesome they wanted to know how they could help me. I told them I needed night shifts. Wow, what a big difference my life became. I was leaving 2hrs early to work and everything was great! Hence, "was."
A week ago I woke up at 10:35am only to jump out of bed and cursing at myself. Why? Because I was suppose to be at work at 10:30am. The only reason I had an early shift, is because I requested it months ago. I called work in my panic state of mind and when the person I was calling for didnt answer, I hung up. Then I realized the next person I should of talked to I had just hung up the phone with. Good job, Karlee. I quickly called back and my manager told me I had to hurry to work and clock in before my 1hr. What did I do? Jump out of bed and put clean clothes on and ran out the door. I left my driveway at 10:53 and had to clock in by 11:29am. I was speeding to work and clocked in at 11:28am. OH MY GOSH! I was so proud of myself. I did great for the next week until Saturday morning approuched and once again, had an "early" shift. Guess who set 5 alarms and managed to turn them all off in my sleep? yup. Me. Once again, way to go me!
I called my work and said "so, I'm fired." They said they would get the papers in order and call me. So a few hours later I got a call from my manager telling me to come in at my scheduled time the following day (Sunday) . I got to work 30min. early and sat in my car. Once I got to work I went to the office and got suspended. Since I have been employed for over 5 years, corporate has to approve of my termination. Since the last time I was suspended, they wrote be a note saying any more suspensions and i'll be terminated. Yes, I have unofficially been fired from my job of 7 years. The only person I can be mad at is myself. But the way I look at it is I have 1 of 2 options... 1. Keep taking my medicine that makes me completely functional and happy but knocks me out OR 2. Stop taking my medicine and become very depressed. Honestly, I think God must have something in store for me. Not sure what, but I sure hope its good!
If any of my co-workers read this, I'm going to miss you. You have been a great "Costco family." <3 Keep in touch!
I think if I have a quote for this month, it would have to be "All good things must come to an end."
the end.
